The Voices In My Head: Good, Wholesome Pattaya Fun

Pattaya was loads of fun! We got back to Bangkok on Sunday night and I had to haul major ass at 11 PM for today's presentation on Lamellipodia cell motility and its ability to invade (angiogenesis) blood vessels and other memebranes (HEHHH???). Miraculously, everything managed to somehow work out and the presentation went grrreat. Bwahahaha, I am the reigning queen of procrastination, indeed.

Anyway, this entry is a little heavy on graphics, so it might take some time to load. You can click on the pics below to enlarge them.

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The drive to Pattaya took about three hours (one of which was spent in Bangkok traffic), and so we arrived there at about 5 PM. After checking into the Amari Orchid Resort, my mom collapsed onto the bed and zonked out, and so my dad came a-knocking on my door asking if J and I wanted to join him for a walk along the beach. Well, shooore, dad! The sun was just getting ready to set, and so everything was very picturesque despite many of the darn farangs who were loitering about flirting with some local prostitutes. Yep, good wholesome fun.

Walking from the hotel towards the beach. (Sorry for the horrible lighting!)

You can't really see them, but there was a group of farang guys off in the distance. I swear one of them was the spitting image of Orlando Bloom. Really, Girl Scouts honor. Either that or my eyes were playing tricks on me (which I guess wouldn't be that odd, what with ROTK hitting theaters next week and all. But seriously, he really did look like Orlando Bloom).

Some more pretty sunset pics.

Silhouette of a lady carrying some snacks for sale and some tourists climbing out of a boat after an excursion to the nearby islands.

I felt compelled to creep up and sneak a shot of the pic on the right. I spotted these two little girls who were quarrelling about something, and after exchanging a few swats and shouts back and forth, they finally made up and gave each other a huge bear hug. All together now, "Awwww".

We later stopped by Amari again to grab mom from the hotel before heading off into the night in search of some good grub. As we walked through the resort grounds, we noticed that there were some festivities going on in commemoration of HM King Bhumibol's birthday.

We eventually ended up at La Gritta, this quaintly designed, traditional Italian restaurant. It's been a while since I've had such great, authentic Italian cuisine. Yessiree, this, folks, was the real thing. Their lasagna was to-die-for and their pesto sauce alone would have made cardboard taste like the greatest thing on earth. If you ever stop by Pattaya, make sure to pay La Gritta's a visit! Yum, yum!

Afterward, we headed back to our rooms where I nearly teetered off the edge of the balcony while trying to catch a snapshot of the Pattaya skyline at night. After settling in, I got lost in Philippa Gregory's The Other Boleyn Girl for about three hours, caught the Jay Chou music video marathon on MTV (ahhh), and finally fell asleep a few hours later while catching the latest news on CNN. I know, I know, I'm such a nerd.

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After some breakfast the next morning, J and I headed towards the pool. He swam and swam and swam and swam until I began to worry that I was going to have to drag a shriveled-up, pruney, wrinkley Jason back to the room. I, however, didn't swim. I instead settled into one of the lounge chairs and continued reading The Other Boleyn Girl. This book is good, good, good. Yup, it's absolutely un-put-downable. Anyway, as I was reading, this good-looking farang guy suddenly sat down next to me and started striking up a conversation. It started out friendly enough, but after his third sentence, his hand suddenly snaked over and as he reached for my leg, it became clear that the conversation was going to take a turn towards rather vulgar territory, especially when he asked me, "So, how much?". Damn you, you $*&#$@# @$$hole! This isn't the first time this has happened to me in Pattaya! Not all Asian girls in Pattaya are friggin prostitutes!! And get your slimey hand off of me!!! ARGGHHHH. And what was he doing going after prostitutes, anyway? He couldn't have been more than thirty, and he had his whole life ahead of him. Did he want to catch AIDS and die a slow and miserable death??? Anyway, with as much calmness as I could muster, I told him, "sorry bud, but I'm not for sale" and that I hoped he would take home with him some vile, nasty, incurable STD that would make certain body parts of his fall off, and finally told him to enjoy the rest of his stay in Thailand. I then grabbed my book, blazed to my room, and forgot J in the process. Whoops. However, being the great kid that he is, he forgave me, hehehe.

After the ordeal by the pool, J and I did a little exploring. The resort grounds at Amari Orchid Resort are absolutely lovely. There's a seamless Thai/Western fusion feel and the gardens are absolutely lush and beautiful. So, anyway, as we were strolling along, J and I discovered that the resort had go-karts. GO-KARTS! Wheeeee. We go-karted our asses away and would have gone on go-karting 'til sunset if J hadn't accidentally spilled Gatorade all over his crotch. Hahahaha. Poor kid. He had to walk through the entire resort, past a big group of Japanese tourists who wouldn't quit staring at him, through the lobby, and all the way up to our room with this humungous and very visible stain on his crotch. Hehehe, oh well, J and I had a blast anyway.

We later headed towards the beach again where rows of sunbathers were happily roasting in the sun. I don't know exactly why the farangs harbor such a strong affection towards the sun; I mean, fire-engine/lobster-red skin isn't very flattering and does absolutely nothing to compliment blonde hair (much less any hair color). Judging from their speech, I noticed that most of the red farangs were Europeans. I guess that they want to lap up some extra sunshine to last them through the long winter days when they go back home to Europe, hehehe.

We later met up with mom and dad again, and as we walked to this mall called Royal Garden Plaza, my dad stopped to sit on a bench to tie his shoe.

Dad: (sort of jumps off the bench as if it's sizzling hot) "Shit!"
Me: (in mock horror) "Dad! Don't swear!"
Dad:"No, really, shit! There's dog shit on the bench!"
Me: (upon closer inspection) "That's not shit, Dad."
Dad:"Well, it certainly looked like it."

Heh, the shitty bench.

So, after departing the doo-doo bench, we headed to Royal Garden Plaza. Since it was vacation and all, I gave in to the chocoholic in me and nearly died relishing in Coffee World's Chocolate Passion drink. God bless Coffee World for being so utterly generous with their whip cream and super creamy chocolate.

(After all that Italian and chocolate this weekend, looks like someone's gonna have to work out like a maniac for the next week or so. )

Anyway, we spent the rest of the day at Royal Garden Plaza and checked out Ripley's Believe It Or Not. This is a pic of Ripley's from the outside and you can see the infamous plane "crashing" into the side of the building. We later had some GREAT seafood at this place that was literally by the sea. Despite the slightly sticky air and occassional gust of wind and sand, the food was plain delicious and I ate soo much Tom Yum Koong and Pad Poo Pong Ka-ree.

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Before heading back to Bangkok the next afternoon, we stopped by the new Pattaya Underwater World Aquarium. I don't think I've seen more fish, stingrays, algae and marine life since my childhood field trips to Marine World in Vallejo. They didn't allow us to bring in our cameras (something about blinding the fish and causing them permanent damage...), but I managed to snap a pic of a rather odd, rather rare fish below.

I agree with you. Indeed, this lil critter is much scarier than Bruce the Shark.